Inaction. Laziness. Fear.
Why am I stuck where I am weight/health-wise right now? A combination of all of these things. And it’s all on me – I own this. I try to get motivated, I do great for a few days, then bam, I sabotage myself over and over again. This week I gained .4 lbs, so I’m right back to where I was one year ago now, 168lbs. I’m angry at myself, disappointed in myself, and embarrassed.
Why do I do this? Honestly, I think part of it is that it’s just easier to roll with it all. To not make sweeping changes in my life. To eat when I’m stressed or overwhelmed or sad. This is so very true. This is true for most people I know. Inaction becomes a way of life. as the Dr. Ben Michaelis book I just read discussed, we have adopted “running in place” as a lifestyle. We are stuck because we know nothing else. We are not happy where we are, but we’ve been there for so long that it’s more comfortable to stay there than to try to change things. Or we don’t know where to start.
I saw a quote circulating around Facebook the other day, originally from Bonnie Pfiester’s blog, that really hit home:
It’s incredibly overwhelming to begin true life changes. And trying to make many changes at once is what has been setting me back week after week. Because if I cannot stick to one of the changes, I let things unravel completely. THAT is what has to stop. I don’t want to be the same old me anymore. I know there is a better me underneath it all and I want her to emerge and conquer those fears and that inaction.
I know that there are many of you out there who struggle in the same way. I am working on small changes, week by week, that I can make to start myself on the path toward real lifestyle changes. I’m not going to be getting up at the crack of dawn 6 days a week and suddenly eating nothing but kale. But I can make small changes each day. And I will share them with you. I hope that they inspire you the way that so many others have inspired me to stick with this journey instead of giving up after so many starts and stops.